Second Essay

I'm still pending about what to do for the second essay. All the stories that we've read have given me many ideas but I think I'm going to go with an essay on parenting. I found a greater interest in this after seeing "Ordinary People". I noticed how it's hard to find a balance in family and marriage life as seen by the Mother of Conrad in the movie. I could also get some research on why people divorce and how the roles of parenting and marriage have shifted. Another idea I had was about protection in families. I've kind of stayed away from this idea because it seems like a pretty obvious idea to talk about because it's played throught out all the stories we've read. But I don't know, we'll see what happens.

Ordinary People

While I was watching all the parts of this movie, I noticed alot of things. One of the things I noticed was the relationship between the parents. The mother is more introverted then the father. She keeps her feelings hidden from herself and others. I think that since her older son had died, she faults Conrad for his death. She doesn't have a relationship with Conrad like she did with her her olde son, Buck. Conrad had some mental issues involving his brother's death. He's been taking the fault himself. However, the parents feel like they need to keep Conrad straight and the mother feels that the family issues should stay within the family. The mother in a way reminded me of myself. I can be a very private person and I can keep to myself at times which can be a good thing and a bad thing. I noticed alot of things about parenthood. It's like a constant struggle within the parents relationship. This whole notion about "worrying" about your children and how you shouldn't because it's a waste of energy. I do think that that is true to a certain extent. It's natural for parents to worry about there children, but there is a time when parents need to learn that they can no longer control their kids. It's a time when the kids have start to use there own judgement and use what their parents have instilled in them. Another thin about Conrad's mother was that she is a very selfish person and also insecure. I got to wondering about how couples change in marriages. I thought about how important it is for BOTH parents to be level-headed and balanced in order to keep there families and marraige together. It's a big struggle being in a marriage and parenting, it's not all you see in movies and stories. It can be a big sacrifice, one that you may not be willing to take.

"I Stand Here Ironing"

"I Stand Here Ironing" by Tillie Olsen

This story took a while for me to get the principle or the main idea that the author was trying to express. What I got out of the story was the struggles of being a young mother and the competitiveness that siblings go through. With the mother, being that she was young, I felt that maybe she thinks she didn't raise her children right. She was having the same kinds of struggles and emotions that many single mothers have. Financial and mental difficulties plays a part on the limits that are set for a mother to raise her children properly. I noticed at the beginning of the story how the mother was saying how the baby was so beautiful and she was full of happiness. Then later on the mother had to send her baby to live with it's father's family and that caused a changed between the mother-daughter relationship. I believe that it's a crucial thing that a mother and her baby have a strong bond because it can cause setbacks between them in the future. At times while I was reading, I got confused about the ages of the daughters and at the end, I didn't really know which daughter she was refering to. In the middle part of the story, the mother was talking about how her daugher Emily had to go away to this place where they would look after her.

The mother described Emily as having low self-esteem and always downing herself and how she looked. But underneath all of that darkness lies a child who had a sense of humor and was able to make people laugh. Susan,who was the younger daughter, was the daughter who seemed to have everything going for her. When the mother started talking about how Susan had a gift and she won an award for it, I was wondering what the gift was? That confused me all the way until the last paragraph when the mother looked about on all the struggles she went through with her daughter, but I didn't know which she was talking about. The mother referred to the daughter as "she" not "Emily" or "Susan".Hmm...

"Sonny Blues"

"Sonny's Blues" by James Baldwin

In the beginning of the story, I kept wondering about what he was reading in the newspaper and what it was about. Why does he feel like he should convince himself that what he was reading wasn't true. Then I was trying to figure out what he mean't by "being trapped in the darkness which roared outside"? I liked how Baldwin personified "darknes" as something that roars. As read on in the paragraphs I was shocked to find out that the algebra teacher who was reading the paper was Sonny's older brother. When I was reading the part about how he compared his brother and himself to the students at his school and how throughtout all the negative noise and cursing in th hallways, he found one student's calming whistle to drown out all the noise. The older brother talked about how limited his students where and that they are only exposed to darkness. I agree with him. Sometimes in low class neighborhoods, people are disadvantaged and aren't as exposed to as many things as they should be. This brought me back to the story as it went on talking about how Sonny reunites with his brother and his older brother is hoping that Sonny won't go back to doing drugs on the street. In families, members do feel like they have a responsibility to look out for loved ones who are in need of help. I also noticed how the older brother didn't really support Sonny's decision to become a Jazz musician. Towards the end of the story, I had a feeling that Sonny was going to die, but I was glad to find out that he had his own little family at the Village Jazz club and he was rocking that club with his piano performance.

"Rappacini's Daughter"

"Rappacini's Daughter" by Nathaniel Hawthorne











Okay, I'm not going to lie...this story REALLY confused me at first.

The language and the whole tone of the story was difficult, but that's suppose to make you grow, right?

This story made me think about how father's are so protective of their daughters. It was also interesting how you could compare this story in some way to Adam and Eve in the Bible. At first I thought Rappaccini didn't want his daughter to be with anyone else. Like he wanted her all to himself. This makes me think about the "father-daughter" relationship. Sometimes I think a father may have sense of "jealousy" towards any man wanting to be with his special "flower".

I feel that a father may feel threatened by that fact that his daughter could love another man, other than himself. But the fascinating part about a father's jealousy is that it can be changed if he feels comfortable about who his daughter is going to be with.

Haunted Houses: "Bone Black"

"Bone Black" by Bell Hooks

At the beginning of the story Hooks tells the story of a controlling father. "They", I pressume, are referred to the children of the mother and father who are fighting. The first sentence says that " they have never heard their [parents]...fighting" That made me wonder if whether or not their parents where keeping that part of their relationship hidden from their kids? or Whether this was realy the very first time the parents had a fight. Then Hooks shifts the attention from the children,"they",to the daughter,"she". I was confused when I first read this section. At first I thought the "she" was referring to the mother when come to find out it was the daughter.

As I read on, It seemed that the "she" shifted from the daughter to the mother of "they". I noticed how the father seems to constantly feel angry. He comes home angry and displaces his anger on those in the family because he is hurt. He probably has alot on his shoulders and doesn't know how to cope with it. He likes to feel that he is the "Alpha-male" and it makes him feel powerful.The daughter seems to feel the mother's pain and wants to help her. The daughter, who becomes "I" as the pov shifts, can't bear to go visit her mother in the hospital, and is feeling betrayed by her siblings.

In the second part of the story, I found it interesting that the daughter felt like she should "rescue" her mother from her father's threats. I've learned that sometimes in most dysfunctional families, the children end up taking over the roles of the parents. They feel like it's "their" duty to make sure the family stays together and that the younger siblings are taken care of, robbing childhoods of the older siblings. Another part of the story that interested me was when the father was kicking the mother out of the house. The mother had some hope that her brother was going to be there and rescue her relationship and everything was going to be okay. Come to find out her brother wasn't much help at all. This reminds of how females are when it comes to their men. We can always rely on our fathers, brothers, or uncles to come support and back us up if we ever have problems with our relationship( especially if it's physical). The end of the story was in favor of the husband. The daughter is upset and angry that her mother is still under her dad's authority. One day she rebels against her mother and disclaims her. The daughter feels guilty for the pain she caused her mother and is willing to be punished because of it. I believe that alot of families have these secrets that they keep and feel like they need to hold their tongue so the family won't be looked down upon.